oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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