She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Holy shit dude........stairs
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