i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
