So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
