found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
