i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
