Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize