doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
