so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm too high and old for this...
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
