butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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