So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize