We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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