okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Randomize
