I think i sorta joined a cult last night
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
soo... how was my night?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize