Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
