At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
P.S. I can't hear my feet
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
