Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
