mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
