You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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