some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Houston, we have a squirter
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
