I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize