Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
