Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Randomize