I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I am spending my child support on dildos
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
