Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
