$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
