I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
