Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
