it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
