i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
