It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
