i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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