who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize