I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
