You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I can't trust your balls anymore.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
