Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize
