so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
We're facebook friends in real life
Moan for me like Helen Keller
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
