Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
