I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Randomize
