Say something about gay babies.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
