Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Threesome in a minivan. New low
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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