No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
We talked him into tasing himself.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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