I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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