you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
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