My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I party with great urgency now.
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