I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
