and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize