Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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