Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
