I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
wow bdsm is so cute
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