she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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