Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
