just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize